Paige was so excited after she graduated high school, one step closer to becoming an adult. Next fall she would be off at college having the time of her life. She couldn’t wait to meet new people and explore new places. Concordia was where she would be attending, majoring in physical therapy.
It was the first of August, move in day had finally com. Paige and her boyfriend Garrett were headed upstate from her hometown, looking at the three hour drive they had ahead of them. The trip dragged on as Paige constantly watched in her rear view mirror at Garrett following in the truck behind. Garrett was two years younger than Paige, so he would have to head back home after helping Paige move in. When they had finally arrived at her new apartments she could barely contain herself any longer. Before she knew it she was holding the keys to her very own place! A place that she could do whatever she wanted, whenever she wanted, because it was hers. Garrett and Paige went up to the top floor, five apartments to the left, and there it was. Inside boxes started to pile in the empty home as Garrett brought in boxes, Paige unpacked them bit by bit. Finally once all the furniture was placed, the hollow rooms began to look like a living space and Paige and Garrett were thrilled. Garrett made dinner for the two of them and they spent the rest of the evening putting all of Paige’s belongings in their proper places. This was the only night alone they would ever have. The next morning Paige woke up and took a shower, but when she got out she found Garrett distressed. “I can’t do this to you, you need to experience college and have fun,” he said to her. He left her.
All alone in this new strange place that used to be full of promise and excitement, now looked like lonely, lifeless prison that she would remain in for the longest of time. Days went by slowly, in agony she laid in her bed with no desire to ever leave, crying during the night and sleeping few hours in the day whenever her body got exhausted enough to make her stop sobbing. A whole week had passed by and it was time to face the world. Her mother had come to visit along with Paige’s little sister. Her mother had understood what she was going though and tried to help in any way she could to get Paige back onto her feet again. Eventually Paige threw her hands to her sides and let the weight roll off of her shoulders. It was time for this to stop. No more moping around and staying down in the dumps, it was misery.
School would start in just two weeks, and Paige would be so grateful to see some familiar faces. The weekend before school started is when all the rest of the college students had started to migrate towards the area. When the students had arrived, so did the parties. Paige went to enjoy herself and wanted to have as much fun as possible. Is what should have been going on in her mind, instead forgetting him was the number one priority on her list. She had no problem fitting in with the crowd and drinking as much as she could before things started getting fuzzy in her mind. Even the alcohol couldn't keep her memories at bay and she continued to make bad decisions with her new care free attitude. She drunkenly got into bad situations with guys that in softer terms did not like her for her personality. None of that mattered to her of course, Paige just desperately wanted attention and to be loved. Lust is not love.
Even though she was unaware of the fact that she was getting better it was true. She continued to party, but with intentions on having fun instead of getting wasted. She met new people and started having a good time with her old high school friends that were going to Concordia as well. One weekend she was thrown off again and trying to drown her sorrows in alcohol and ended up puking her guts out. Her best friend and another guy rushed to help her and eventually got her to sleep on the couch. The next morning was one of the worst hangovers, so Paige, Blake, and Zach she later learned, headed into town to get Subway. There was a spark between Zach and her. She liked the way he showed her kindness at one of her worst moments.
After a few weeks a new relationship had sprouted. One of the fastest paced relationships she had ever been in, after just two weeks she was going to see his family with him. After two more weeks passed they were staying the night at each other’s places and shopping for groceries together. Paige felt like a whole new person, but happy all the same. Zach was a great guy, he was funny, sweet, and easygoing. They enjoyed spending their time together even if it meant doing their homework in the same room. She felt like her own person again and she had control over her feelings once more.
This of course had to be the time when Garrett came back into the picture. Just as Paige was getting better he decided to let her know how he felt. He claimed he missed her and begged for her to come back to him on a weekly basis. Even though she was content in a relationship with Zach, her feelings for Garrett had not yet submerged and stung just as bad when she started thinking of him again as they did when he left.
Paige was possibly worse now than she was before. With all of these options shoved in front of her face she had no idea witch one was best or cause the least amount to hurt. As if all of this wasn't enough to deal with, there was Austin. A man whom she shared several classes with, took interest in Paige and was sure to let her know. He was quiet yet quite hysterical at times. Austin was honest with Paige, and sometimes they would stay awake for hours just talking. She could say anything to him and he would just listen to her and offer the best response he could give. Even though Austin had strong feelings for Paige, he never let that get in the way of their friendship. He just wanted her to be happy.
Paige’s relationship started to degrade due to all the stress she carried around not knowing what correct answer was. She was short tempered at times and found herself lying awake at night hoping her thought could sort their way through all of it. Paige was absolutely baffled. She had no clue what to do and had mixed feelings for every one of the guys that wanted to be part of her life. Paige never wanted to hurt anyone. She spent her whole life pleasing others and maintaining harmony with others around her, and this made her happy. What she didn't realize was that in order to make everyone happy she was always putting her own feelings last and it was making her melancholy. She needed to figure out for herself what it was that she wanted, and whether or not that answer was the right choice. She needed to be happy again and she knew just what to do…
It was time for Paige to be on her own again. She needed this time for herself and she needed full autonomy to do whatever pleased her. She learned she couldn't carry around her loved ones forever, and it was not her duty to make decisions based upon the people around her. She had a duty to her heart and she had promised herself that day that she would never forget that duty so long as she lived.
All alone in this new strange place...
forgetting him was the number one priority
She had a duty to her heart
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