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The Looney Daily # 1

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we have a right to 
no...wait...not those arms...stroll down more...
THESE ARMS BABY. READY FOR SUMMER!                       DAYTONA BEACH! Baring arms all day. 
Bet you thought this was going to be political...didn't ya? 

He waxes his back...
I can tell...
How the hell did this all of a sudden turn into fitness? Where are the damn donuts people!! Donuts at 2am!!! 
Wanna know how to make a Colombian powered Donut? 
make standard donut but use real powered sugar. (Wink) 
That's how we use do it...but we didn't use donuts. But, we don't use ballots either. 
  B R E A K I N G   N E W S !

Oye, how does an Argentine commit suicide? He climbs to the top of his ego and jumps off. 
Marvin the Martian just won the elections in Mars. 
Marvin the Martian has just been elected ruler of Mars. It is unprecedented how he won with so many disadvantages, one of them being he doesn't have a mouth. World leaders spent the day puzzled with the outcome of the election. Marvin did get a warm welcome from Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. Satan also approved and sent a telegram with candy dried turds. The US state department expressed concern with Marvin.  In power he can funnel lasers to North Korea. 
This post is brought to you by 
DOGGY shakes 

Doggy Hair 
Caramel Caca 
Chocolate Mystery 
Meaty Pudding 
Cherry blood 
Considered a favorite among Hollywood's elite. Doggy Shakes pack a punch for the rich who are on the go. High in fiber and the wonderful taste never seems to leave your mouth after you have one. Shake your life to that America! 
Now, you got these pinheads sellin' the stuff...these Doggy Shakes. I'm thinking...I remember when my mom made me doggy shakes...hell we had to scrape it off of the carpet ourselves. Now, Hollywood is selling it to us? The folks don't understand it...neither do I. And that's the memo. 
Please guys, I just had a shake in LA. I can't do it. Michelle will get mad at me! 
Little did the President know...He was being served fine wine by Secret Agent 000. 
 He was gathering  intelligence for Mars. 
We don't hire in Mars. 
Get the hell out of here. 
I don't know what the people in Mars are thinking by electing this Looney Tune. They better wake up when their ruler sends spies to Presidental dinners is all I'm saying. Cartoons are bad folks. It's hurting our children...and that's the memo.